Celebrity Inspired Slot Machines

by Bodog Casino | Sep 18 2009

You ever see the guts of a slot machine? If you get a look inside you'll see that it's a complicated mess. Random-number generators, coins, reels, wires, and the mechanics that make that lever nobody uses anymore; they look simple on the outside but they can be as complicated as a desktop computer on the inside. We'd imagine they'd be difficult for anyone to build, for anyone except those in the entertainment industry that is.

Celebs who can barely act already think they can sing and vice versa so they probably think slot machine invention would be a layup if they tried it out. That's why we've opened up our imagination and thought "what would a slot machine be if a 'mega star' had created it"?
We write down our thoughts below.

The Kanye West Slot Machine
"Flashing Lights," lots of flashing lights. We think Mr. West's slot would have vibrant color and cool art deco style. The machine would have some of the coolest most unique music you'll find on any slot in a casino, unfortunately most of the tunes would be ruined by West's distorted, auto-tune voice.

Most annoying part is if you happen to win the jackpot on his machine just before you get paid he'll pop up on and say "yo man I know you just won a huge jackpot and imma let you cash it but I just wanna let you know another customer's jackpot in December was the best one this year!"

What a jackass.

The Michael Bay Slot Machine
It'll be all action with a low payoff. Expect eye-popping explosions, numerous racial stereotypes and for it to take way too long to reach its climax. Oh, and there will be endless product placement. Amazingly millions will still play it.

The Chris Brown Slot Machine
Chris Brown's slot will be kind to your wallet, nice to your ego, and gentle to your eyes at first. In fact, at first it'll be one of your favorite machines. It's when you try to get up and go to another slot is when things will get ugly. Be prepared to find out what that "one arm" is truly for.

The Lady Gaga Slot Machine
We expect her slot to be a favorite among drag queens and transvestites everywhere. The machine will be ugly but still hold your attention with lots of T & A and absolutely train wreck fashion choices splashed all over its screen. And expect to hear "Poker Face" until you want to stab your ear drums.

The Lindsay Lohan Slot Machine
Lohan's machine will be a wreck. It'll have bad music, its full motion video will make you wonder how someone approved to display it to the public, and from time to time the machine will have a complete breakdown. And if you hang around long enough to win a jackpot it'll steal your money and deny all knowledge of it.

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